Fame

Last night we took our baby JJ to house group. We’ve done this as many times as possible since he was born. JJ is a good sleeper…once he’s asleep. So, we were really conscious of him staying up as late as he could when he goes to people’s houses in the evening, just because it’s light and there’s chatter to join in with. At home, if he’s in his cot, the room is dark, his music thing is playing, and he’s a toy to play with, and someone pops in regularly to pop his dummy back in his mouth, then he will fall asleep. But any whiff of a party and he can keep the shut eye away for hours.

So, we decided that rather than heft a travel cot with us, we would try a blow up toddler bed, so he had somewhere to lie down on in a darkened room. We wrapped a blanket over it so he wouldn’t try to snuggle under the duvet bit, and tucked him into a baby grow bag (like a sleeping bag for babies). One bottle later, and a bit of dummy back in back out and he slipped into the land of nod. The window we have for taking him places has been fairly wide as he’s a bit of a cheery chap who adapts to different places fast. Everyone came for a gawk later – there is nothing as sweet as watching a sleeping child. If anyone thought our method was odd, they didn’t say. We have a lovely group, and those times of fellowship include cracking dinners, fast chat and lengthy coffees. This among other activities has led us to trying to be as creative as possible in making it work for all the family.

Adaptability is the name of the game for both me and JJ. Today we kind of took it to the hilt. I will be writing on the blog a lot more about how we got to where we are, because days like today make it look as if it’s fairly smooth going getting out and about. This has been part of a process, and it’s just that today was one of the highlights.

Tomorrow is the party for my husband’s birthday. We are having afternoon tea. It’s booked for twelve adults, one child and one baby and with one serving of wheat free sandwiches. We had stuff to finalise so after a very slow morning JJ and I set off. It was a risky time to get going, as we were heading towards the bus stop at noon. That’s translates as – JJ likes a good lunch at noon and I was mad to get a bus at that hour. I had brought with us one of Ella’s Kitchen pouches and a spoon so we could munch on the completion of our journey. We love Ella’s pouches. Perfect travelling food. And yummy too. I know so, because JJ says mm, mm, mm more eating pouches than anything else.

The bus arrives and we are informed they have a wheelchair already. No worries, say I, when shall the next bus be? Driver reckoned about another ten minutes or so.

JJ was in the Baby Bjorn carrier facing me. This meant he was on my lap and very secure. I had a pouch. I had a spoon. I had a bib.

Well, then, I thought, let’s have lunch.

Ooh, that’s brave you say. Yes it was – not only because the pouch had apples and carrots, it also had parsnip. And we hadn’t done parsnip yet.

I prepared the way, and the spooning began. JJ very happy, mm, mm, mm.

I will put in brackets the interactions of the day, so you can see a typical day, and the kind of conversations I have out and about.

(Woman at bus stop approaches. She tells me something incomprehensible about my bus card and a folder. I nod, smile and thank her. Spoon, spoon, spoon. I realise my bag is on the ground exposed to wiley robbers. I cover the bag with my foot. Oh, goes the woman, do you want that bag up? No thank you, smile, smile. She boards another bus).

(New woman approaches. She is baffled. What the heck are we doing? I show her the pouch. Oh, she says, I thought that was juice. How, she surmised, was it possible to spoon juice into a baby? I wax lyrical about the magical pouches till the bus turns up).

It’s going well. I board the bus and it’s one of the really big ones, which means I get to show off. I board, and then reverse park into the wheelchair bay, whilst the bus is moving. The journey is smooth. Well, then, I think, let’s continue. Spoon, spoon, spoon. Very happy baby. Food and changing scenery. I wander if this will upset his tummy but reckon that as he is upright, this should hopefully be ok. We finish the pouch, and I tidy up. The trickiest bit was trying to take his photograph afterwards. Nobody spoke to us on the bus. If you act weird, then sometimes there is a threshold. You can tell me folk thought nothing of it, but to be honest I think wherever we go, folk are trying not to say – ooooh, look at that baby, and the mummy in the chair. I was glad we got ignored; coz spooning food into a baby that likes to chat can be a challenge.

We decant and then we negotiate some terrible kerbs, but the shop we needed to get to had shut down. Plan B. We find a shop eventually that has birthday banners. I yank out my grabber that is tucked into a pocket at the back of the chair as they are up high. Two banners down, then eventually someone comes to see if we need help. Good. Coz as much as that is the ultimate in independence – it’s obvious I’m not that good at the grabbing trick from a seated position. We finalise our purchases and then I have to explain how to get the grabber back into the pocket. It has its uses, but suspect in the long term am just going to have to keep asking for help with stuff up high.

Time to get a cake, so we go to the supermarket, and after choosing that that we go to pick up a fresh Ella magic pouch for tomorrow. An assistant approaches, and full brownie points for asking after was there anything else, but when I said no, he accepted that and moved off without too much hovering. However, not before confessing he loves Ella’s pouches too! When he can’t be bothered using his juicer he whaps down one of the fruit ones. True dedication to your five a day.

(We leave and then the class act begins. A woman approaches. JJ is asleep now, after a bit of giggling and a sing song from me, as we whirled along. Oooh, lovely baby. Yes, yes. Such long eyelashes! Nod, nod. They are. I tell her about his big eyes, and what a flirt he is. So, she asks, how do you manage? She answers this herself – you just do, don’t you?

You know people in the shop were talking about you, she tells me, and saying, ooh, look at that baby and the mother in the chair? I smile. Man alive, it’s true. And I don’t even see it happening, never mind hear all the comments.

She then asks the question that does bug me, because it is no ones business, but I’m in the mood for a wee chat. Can you walk at all then? I explain how far my mobility stretches and talk a bit about how I’ve set up the house, etc. Ooh, aren’t, you marvellous, she says. She refers to my ‘Brave Wee Soul’ sticker on the back of the chair and tells me it’s so true.

Then, she touches my arm.

Oooh, she cries, I’ve touched a famous person!

Ooh, you’re famous!

I don’t know. I think I blinked a bit. It was sunny, and I had enough smiles left.

So she cries as she departs, how could I be famous then? I know, I could get pregnant at eighty four. I wish her all the best)

We deliver cake, banners, etc, and visit the disabled toilet and have a quick nappy change for JJ, before boarding a bus to take us home.

Famous or not, there ends my tale of out and about. Delighted to say, food stayed in the happy baby, and not one carrot stained item to be seen.